


From the Outside Looking In

by avidbeader



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Kuron, M/M, Post-Season/Series 04, hints of mallura, mentions of allurance, somebody's gotta talk to keith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2017-11-23
Packaged: 2019-01-20 11:50:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12432237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avidbeader/pseuds/avidbeader
Summary: Keith and Shiro are not interacting the way Matt remembers them. Matt wants to know why.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I need to start another story like I need a hole in the head. But I just have to try and write out some of my thoughts and frustrations while we wait and see if S5 or S6 resolves some of the unanswered questions.
> 
> So, this is the first chapter of a story set right after S4. I hope it won’t run more than 3-4 chapters, but we’ll see what happens along the way. Spoilers for S4, of course. Many thanks to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) and [ephemerall](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ephemerall/pseuds/ephemerall) for beta help!
> 
> I'm on Twitter and Tumblr at avidbeader. Come say hi!

 

 

As Matt headed down the hall, he jumped when a door slid open unexpectedly.  It revealed Keith, dressed in that red jacket he’d had since their Garrison days and carrying a bag over his shoulder. Keith brightened a little at seeing him.

 

“Oh, good. I’ve said goodbye to everyone else and I was hoping I’d see you before I left.” He held out one hand and Matt took it. Keith continued, “That was some great work from you all. I’m sure Kolivan will be in touch the next time there’s a situation where we can help each other out.”

 

Matt squeezed Keith’s hand and let go to clap him on the shoulder. “Sounds good, but can we not do the kamikaze move next time?”

 

A flash of…something...darkened Keith’s expression before he smiled ruefully. “Well, sometimes you don’t have a choice. When one life can save thousands? Millions? How many people would have died if Naxzela had blown up?” He shrugged. “And it’s not like I’m anything important anymore.”

 

Matt’s eyes widened as Keith turned and strode down the hall. The last time he’d heard something like that was Keith’s second year at the Garrison. He had been sulking over a debriefing after a simulator run in which he’d killed himself and his crew in a desperate move to salvage a no-win situation. His actions had resulted in the highest survival rate ever for the targets being rescued in that scenario but he had been taken to task for not consulting his team about it. After the debriefing they were in Shiro’s apartment as Shiro tried to explain why the instructors had been so harsh.

 

_“I’m not saying what you did was the wrong thing, Keith, but you should have told your team what you were about to do. You’re supposed to make decisions together.” He raised his hands from his spot on the couch, almost pleading with Keith to see it his way._

 

_Keith continued to pace the room. “Yeah, except as the pilot I’m the one in command of the team and there wasn’t time. They’d’ve argued and the window for moving in would have been lost.”_

 

_“What if they’d had a better option?”_

 

 _“There_ was _no other option! I tried to think of anything else but we were completely outnumbered! And I know Tabor and Piñeda. Tabor would have wanted to signal retreat and hope everyone else was good enough to get out of range of the attackers. Piñeda would have tried to hack something to increase our speed or power and it would have taken too long. Ramming the enemy leader into the next jet caused their formation to break and created enough confusion to let everyone else make a clean getaway.”_

 

_“At the cost of your lives.”_

 

_“Look, I’m sorry that it meant all three of us dying, but the numbers speak for themselves. Three dead against a hundred sixty-two saved. Iverson said flat-out it was the best result ever. And it’s not like I’m important anyway.”_

 

 _“Keith!” Shiro shot to his feet. He grabbed the teen by the shoulders and swung him around. “Yes, you are! You_ are _important! Don’t ever say something like that!”_

 

_Matt felt his eyebrows shoot for his hair behind his glasses. But Keith looked even more stunned at Shiro’s declaration._

 

_Shiro pulled Keith closer, holding him in place just a few inches away. “Promise me. Promise me you’ll never consider doing something like that unless there is absolutely no other choice.”_

 

_Keith’s mouth worked soundlessly as he tried to come up with an answer. Finally he lifted his own hands to Shiro’s face and Shiro loosened his grip, trailing his hands down Keith’s arms._

 

_“I promise, Takashi.”_

 

Matt shook his head to bring himself out of the memory. “Hey, Keith?”

 

Keith stopped and turned. “Yeah?”

 

“Was there really no other choice, back there?”

 

Matt expected anger or frustration at being questioned. Instead, Keith’s eyes grew sad. He looked down briefly, then back up with that rueful smile again. “Not like I could count on one of our mortal enemies showing up with enough firepower to solve the problem, you know?” He gave a brief wave. “Gotta go. They’ll be waiting for me. I promised I wouldn’t take long.”

 

“Okay. Talk to you soon, all right?”

 

Keith nodded and walked away again while Matt watched him go. Once Keith was out of sight, Matt’s face hardened and he turned to head for the command center.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Shiro was talking with Pidge and Hunk when Matt entered. He paused, noting that the conversation was just between his sister and the other resident genius while Shiro listened.

 

“Hey, Shiro! I need to talk to you.”

 

Shiro turned to him and Matt was struck yet again by that tiny sense of _different_. Two years lost in space, going through stars only knew what kind of hell to lose his arm, of course he would seem different. Matt was different, too. But sometimes it didn’t seem like the right kind of different.

 

“What is it, Matt?”

 

“Keith’s leaving!”

 

Pidge and Hunk broke off their discussion at the force in Matt’s voice. Shiro nodded, as if Matt had told him they expected rain tomorrow. “Yes, he and the Blade need to assess where they can do the most good now that we’ve taken so much territory from Zarkon.”

 

“Did you at least talk to him?”

 

Shiro frowned. “We all said goodbye. We’ll see him the next time we need to coordinate.”

 

Okay, now the sense of _different_ was more than tiny. Where was the Shiro that always had Keith’s back? For that matter, where was the Keith who stuck like glue to Shiro’s side? He remembered their very first visit to the launch area for Kerberos, seeing the ship’s construction up close, his family and Shiro exploring in growing excitement over the tangible evidence that the mission was really happening. Shiro had brought Keith, the teenage brat who was only a few years older than Katie but already breaking Shiro’s records in the simulators. Matt had been surprised at how different Keith was away from his peers. He had looked around the launch area in awe, listening closely to everything Shiro said, with a look of pure longing on his face.

 

_Shiro put a hand to Keith’s shoulder and leaned in. In a low voice, Shiro said, “Next time, it’ll be both of us. I’ll do my part and come back safe. You do your part and be the best pilot in the Garrison when I get back.”_

 

_Keith smiled before noticing Matt’s presence and hunching into himself a bit._

 

_Shiro looked over, saw Matt, and waved. “Matt, come here. I need to introduce you two.”_

 

And just like that, Matt had met Shiro’s shadow. Slowly over the next two years of preparation, he had discovered some of the Keith that stayed hidden under his surly surface. The Keith that only Shiro knew well.

 

Now he looked at Shiro in shock. “What the hell? He nearly killed himself out there and you’re just going to let him leave with a ‘be seeing you’?”

 

Hunk sat up from his slouch, his feet thudding on the floor. “What do you mean?”

 

Matt looked at their uncomprehending faces. “Seriously? You didn’t know? He was going to ram his fighter into the shield to try and bring it down so we could take out the transmitter!”

 

Both Pidge and Hunk looked stunned. Pidge let out a breath. “That’s what you meant...you yelled at Keith not to do something…”

 

But Shiro only frowned. “Well, it all worked out. Lotor solved that problem and now we have a new one as we figure out what he wants from us.”

 

Now three shocked faces stared at Shiro. He looked mystified. “What?”

 

“I can’t believe what you just said! This is Keith we’re talking about!” Matt shouted. “What happened to ‘promise me you’ll never do something like that unless there’s no other choice’?”

 

Shiro’s brows furrowed, not making the connection. “Look, we’re at war here. Sometimes…sometimes sacrifices need to be made.”

 

“And you’ll just accept it if Keith sacrifices himself without even trying to find another way?”

 

And then Matt got support from an unexpected source.

 

“Or even if there is no other way, not letting it bother you for a single minute?” Pidge hissed. “I heard you! When we attacked Zarkon’s command center and Thace was caught and Keith had to infiltrate to take down the defenses? You know, the _suicide mission_ according to Kolivan? You told me to get the cloak up on a pod and I heard you when you said Keith’s name! It almost wrecked you to let him go!”

 

Hunk nodded. “We all heard it, Shiro. What’s so different now?”

 

“I…” Shiro lifted one hand to the side of his head and pressed his fingers into the short hair behind his ear, massaging the spot.

 

Pidge’s eyes narrowed. “Another headache?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

_Since when does Shiro get headaches?_

 

Matt glared at him once more. “Maybe you should get it checked out. Have them search for your heart while they’re at it. Because the Shiro I knew would never have let Keith just walk away.” He gave Pidge a brief wave and exited the room.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Matt was striding down the hall so fast that he couldn’t stop himself when a figure popped out of a room. They collided and Matt grabbed the other’s arms to steady them. Then he recognized Lance and let go, remembering the teenager’s antipathy toward him.

 

“Where are _you_ going?” Lance snarled.

 

Yep, antipathy still there even though Matt had long since calmed down after his initial meeting with Allura. Other than thoroughly enjoying looking at her when they were in the same room.

 

“Back to the fleet. We need to coordinate supplies to the region around Naxzela.”

 

“That’s fine. You go back to your people, Keith goes back to his. Everybody in their little corner.”

 

Matt was walking away but whirled around at that. “What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?”

 

Lance flapped a hand at him. “You’ve got your band of rebels and you’re all cozy with them. Keith is with his Galra buddies.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“You haven’t heard? Keith’s half-alien. Galra, of course, because the universe has a nasty sense of humor. But naturally he prefers hanging out with them instead of staying where he had responsibilities.”

 

“He...what?”

 

“Oh, go ask Shiro if you want the details! He was there when Keith found out!” Lance turned and stalked away as Matt stared after him.

 

_How in all the stars could Keith be Galra?_

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

_I shouldn’t be doing this._

 

But her fingers danced across the holopanels, shifting from one camera to the next as she followed Shiro’s path through the castle halls. He had said he was going to find Coran and ask for a quick medical scan.

 

But there was something in his voice that told Pidge he was lying. And now that she was thinking about it, really thinking and not just reacting to situations, it felt like that something had been there for a while. Ever since they had found him in that adrift Galra fighter after weeks and weeks, things had been...different. Off. And now that she knew where Matt was and that problem was solved, she could concentrate on why things felt wrong.

 

Such as Shiro arguing with Keith so much since his return. Sure, they’d had disagreements, but they had always been able to talk them out. And even in the heat of a battle, Shiro had been able to explain his reasoning quickly enough for Keith to come around if he insisted on his option. But now Shiro ordered a whole lot more instead of explaining. And that didn’t make sense either, since Keith was supposed to be their leader.

 

But the minute Shiro was up and around, they had all swung back to him. Even Keith had offered to stay behind that first time and let Shiro return to the Black Lion. Had that been what set the tone? Had that made everyone gravitate back to the old status quo just at the point where they had all begun to feel somewhat confident with Keith leading?

 

Pidge jerked, realizing she’d lost visual on Shiro as her thoughts drifted. She checked the cameras in the halls near the cryo-room and found nothing. Biting her lip, she brought up the program that let her register life forms in any part of the castle. She had never told Coran or Allura about it, holding it in reserve until a severe enough emergency happened.

 

There were life forms in the kitchen and Lance’s room, almost certainly Hunk and Lance, respectively. There were moving forms in the cargo area, which were probably Allura or Coran and the Olkari organizing the latest shipment of food and medicines. There was one headed her way, possibly Coran--she needed to turn this thing off--there! She noted the passage near the hangars and swiped to shut the program down.

 

“Hello, Number Five! What are you up to?”

 

“Nothing, just watching Matt go.”

 

Coran stepped forward and put a hand to her shoulder. “Don’t worry. You’ll see him again soon.”

 

“I know,” she replied absently and got to her feet. “I’m gonna go tinker with Green a bit. Make sure there’s no lingering damage from that gravity field.” She darted out, waving as Coran called after her to be on time for dinner.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Keith was halfway to the base when his comm lit up. He tapped the panel and raised an eyebrow in surprise when he saw Matt’s face.

 

“Didn’t expect to hear from you this soon. What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing’s…” Matt trailed off and looked down for a moment. “No, you know, something might be really wrong. Is there somewhere we can meet and talk?”

 

Keith checked his position and let out a derisive snicker. “Have you been to the space mall that used to be an Unilu swap moon?”

 

“Um...no?”

 

“Sending you the coordinates. There’s got to be at least one coffee shop in that place. But ditch your cloak--the security guy has a thing against people who look like pirates.”

 

“I do not look like a pirate!”

 

Keith rolled his eyes and grinned. “Seriously, if you have any GAC, you could get some fresh clothes while we’re there.”

 

Matt shook his head. “Coran let me raid a storage area full of supplies. I think I’ve got it covered.”

 

An hour later Keith spotted Matt as he approached the central clock. Sure enough, he was wearing what looked like a scaled-back version of Coran’s outfit. Keith waved and Matt jogged over to him.

 

“Okay, that works. Looking good.”

 

“You, too. I can’t believe you still have that jacket after all these years.” Matt’s eyes wandered, taking in the size of the complex. “Have you found a coffee shop?”

 

“If I’m reading the directory right, there’s something like that up on the third floor.” Keith led him to the escalators. “So, what did you want to talk about?”

 

Matt bit his lip. “Okay, first...Lance told me something that I don’t understand. He said...he said you’re...part alien?”

 

Keith concentrated on stepping off the escalator and led Matt to the next one before replying. “Well, yes. I didn’t know growing up, but then things started happening once we were out here.” He pointed to his knife, the one he had always carried when off Garrison property. He saw Matt focus on it, realizing that the wrappings that once covered the hilt were gone. “We met a Galra, a member of the Blade of Marmora and the one who helped Shiro escape back to Earth. He was carrying a sword with the same insignia on it and I started trying to find out more. I eventually learned that somewhere on my mother’s side I’m part Galra. Got initiated into the Blades along the way.”

 

Matt’s eyes were wide with surprise, but, like Shiro, there was no recoil. No revulsion or anger that Keith was part of the race that had treated Matt so cruelly. Keith felt the muscles in his neck and shoulders relax as they stepped off the escalator and started down the hall.

 

And then Matt’s next words knotted them again.

 

“So, is that why Shiro’s different around you now?”

 

“What? No! He was there! He was there when we found out and he…” Keith felt his throat close, remembering how Shiro had patched him up so carefully, held him when he couldn’t keep the tears inside anymore. “He was the only one who didn’t let things change at all, not even for an instant.”

 

Matt frowned. “Explain?”

 

“Everyone else needed time to adjust. I think Pidge was the first to accept it--she started asking about my physiology and wanted to analyze my knife within hours. Lance never really talked to me about it, but he stopped making alien jokes after a couple of days. Hunk was just plain nosy about it all. And Allura…” Keith swallowed, remembering the pain from her rejection. “She avoided me for ages. She just couldn’t reconcile me, someone she thought of as a friend, as family, being part of the race that destroyed her entire planet. It took me going off on a deadly mission to get her to talk to me again.”

 

They paused at the entrance to a place that looked like a typical coffeeshop. Matt tilted his head in a perfect echo of Pidge. “Wait, you pulled another kamikaze move? Shiro’s the one with the Japanese background, not you! Just how many times have you done this?”

 

Keith swallowed hard and looked down, unable to meet Matt’s eyes. “Um...three or four? It’s not like I go in expecting to die!”

 

“Oh, really? What was your plan for surviving the impact from hitting that shield at ramming speed, then?”

 

“I...come on, Matt! Millions of lives were at stake!”

 

Instead of escalating the argument, Matt put a hand on his shoulder and steered him into the shop to get in line. He lowered his voice. “I get that. I get that in the moment you didn’t see another way and I get what you’re saying. What I don’t get is how, after managing to survive it, you and Shiro aren’t clinging to one another like magnets and reassuring each other that you’ve made it through so far. Why isn’t he making you explain breaking your promise to him and yelling at you for not even saying goodbye? Why are you here instead of doing everything you can to remind him you survived? If learning that you’re partly of the race that enslaved him hasn’t driven him away, then what the hell did?”

 

Keith calmed down as Matt began, hearing the sincerity in the other’s voice. And then as he went on, Keith felt a growing chill in his veins. If Matt, who had known them both since before Kerberos, could see just how much things had changed...maybe it wasn’t all in Keith’s head. He tried to sort out his thoughts as Matt consulted with the barista, who set cups in front of them with a hot liquid that was decidedly blue, glittered, and smelled like chai.  They paid up and settled at an empty table.

 

“It...I think it was after he came back the second time. He was missing for months after vanishing from the Black Lion when we defeated Zarkon. And when we found him he was almost dead. He spent a couple of weeks in his room, not letting anyone else in. I thought he’d be working through his PTSD all over again. Instead he got up, found different clothes, ditched his undercut, and started acting like everything was okay. Even when the Black Lion wouldn’t fly for him, he just looked...a bit sad about it.

 

“Before that second disappearance, he was dealing with recognizable symptoms. I know he had nightmares. He’d zone out in flashbacks, especially in combat. At one point the castle got infected from being powered by a Galra crystal --all of us got attacked by the castle’s systems during that little adventure--and he suffered what were possibly hallucinations or possibly a mental probe by a captured Galra officer. Either way it triggered a full-on panic attack.”

 

Matt sat back, staring into his cup. “Stars...I had no idea. He seems so together.” He looked back up. “Too together. Even the way he greeted me when I came back with Pidge. Sure, he pulled me into a hug, but then he let go and started talking...cripes, it was a _speech_. Formal. Like an actor improvising--”

 

“What a leader should say,” Keith finished with him. Goosebumps had broken out on his arms as Keith remembered that first speech Shiro gave when he returned to the command center. And _speech_ was the perfect word. Sure, Shiro had given stirring pep talks in combat before, but this had lacked the energy, the sincerity that Shiro had always conveyed before.

 

“An actor…” Matt breathed, his brows knit as he considered the possibilities. “Some kind of brainwashing? Do we know whether the Galra have cloning capability?”

 

Keith inhaled sharply. “Hunk once said something about that arm, that it could be a way to implant false memories into Shiro’s brain. When he first came back, that one night we were on Earth before finding the Blue Lion, he said his memories were foggy, that his brain felt scrambled.” Keith pressed his hands to his mouth, his mind racing with implications. “But...if that’s _not_ Shiro, where is he?”

 

“And who’s in the castle with the team?”

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) for beta help!
> 
> I'm on Twitter and Tumblr at avidbeader. Come say hi!

Pidge turned into the hallway where Shiro was, following the dot on the display from her vambrace. _I really need to find a way to replicate the paladin tech into something portable…kind of awkward wearing only one bit of my armor..._

 

There were voices coming from somewhere. Pidge paused and checked her display again. Still just Shiro. Who would he be talking to? She crept closer and peered around the last corner.

 

She clapped her hands to her mouth, trying to stifle the shriek that surged up her throat. Shiro was standing in the middle of the deserted storage area, piled high with large crates of supplies. He was holding up his Galra hand. A small comm holopanel rose from the palm and Shiro’s eyes were glowing purple. A very familiar purple that meant nothing good.

 

“...pacifying the territory behind the Naxzela line. The Blade continues to pursue the issue of the new quintessence.”

 

The figure shown in the holopanel nodded. “Excellent. Maintain your surveillance. Operation Kuron continues.” The holopanel winked out.

 

Pidge backpedaled frantically as Shiro’s luminous eyes turned in her direction. Her vambrace knocked against the metal reinforcements on a crate and the sound echoed in the chamber.

 

“Who’s there?”

 

 _Oh, hell!_ Pidge broke and ran, not trying to soften her footsteps. When she heard Shiro starting to close in, she ducked between two crates and looked for a way to climb up and out of his sight. _No bayard, no jetpack, no…_

 

With no more warning than a screech of metal, the world caved in on her.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

They had gathered in the dining hall and Coran glanced around. “Oh, Pidge isn’t here again, of course. Lance, would you get her from Green’s bay? She’s not responding on the comms.”

 

Lance jumped to his feet, eager for a potential distraction. “Sure thing, Coran!” He darted out and into the halls, his mind still wrapped up in trying to find a way to apologize to Matt the next time they saw each other. And maybe Keith as well. He felt vaguely guilty for revealing Keith’s alien heritage like that, but Matt just rubbed him the wrong way with his open admiration of Allura…and how dare he have a late growth spurt and morph from the geeky boy in Pidge’s photo to an impressive swashbuckling rebel?

 

He entered Green’s hangar and looked around. “Hello? Pidge? Time for dinner!” His voice echoed off the walls. There was no clatter of a dropped tool, no cursing over the interruption. “Pidge?”

 

Green growled and Lance was hit with a very faint sense of fear and anger. _**Help her.** _

 

He sprinted out of the bay and started back up the hall, checking every space he passed and shouting for Pidge. He was out of the hangar level and into the area with large cargo holds, currently filled with supplies for refugees and coalition planets. He stuck his head into the next one, shouted for her, and started to move on when she didn’t respond. Then something wrong drew his eyes and he looked again.

 

A stack of crates had toppled over. That wasn’t good; those supplies were needed. Lance approached to try and get a sense of the damage before he called for Coran.

 

_**HELP HER!** _

 

And then Lance saw the glasses on the floor, one lens cracked across.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Keith and Matt crouched to either side of the lone pilot’s seat in Keith’s pod so they could both be seen in the comm panel. The Blade who had answered their call moved to the side so Kolivan could speak to them.

 

“What’s going on? You should have been back over a varga ago.”

 

“Kolivan, I think we have a critical situation involving Voltron. I don’t think that the person in the Castle is the real Shiro.”

 

Kolivan went very still and Matt glanced over at Keith, assuming that the apparent non-reaction was disagreement. But Keith had learned to read the leader of the Blades over the last several months. There was a dimple under his mouth because Kolivan was biting the inside of his lip. His eyes were just a touch wider than normal. Kolivan was considering the possibility and finding it plausible.

 

“Do you think this...person is feeding information to the Empire?”

 

Keith had to swallow against a sudden wave of nausea at the implication. “I...I don’t know. Any unusual messages from the Castle would get picked up sooner or later. Pidge is pretty thorough.”

 

Matt grabbed Keith’s shoulder. “It doesn’t have to be through the Castle. There are hundreds of available frequencies for communication. As long as he has a transmitter that isn’t connected to the ship--”

 

Keith’s face went white. “That arm.”

 

Kolivan nodded. “He knew about our investigations into the new quintessence. The Empire could have used that intel to send the decoy ship.”

 

“He also told us to ignore Haggar’s ship. You know, the one that turned out to be the weapon powering the bomb on Naxzela,” Keith added.

 

“I think we need to investigate this immediately. Go back to the Castle; I have a bit of intelligence that can be made more important than it probably is for you to share.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“There’s a signal coming from the far side of the Naxzela line. Now that we’ve taken down the Galra presence along it, some new communications are getting through. This one is odd, a combination of blips and numbers that don’t make any sense. I thought the Green Paladin might be able to decipher it.”

 

“That’ll work. We’ll head back there now and--”

 

A shrill beep sounded from Matt’s pocket and he pulled out his communicator, frowning. “What the heck?”

 

Coran’s face appeared on the small screen. “Matt! Thank goodness you answered! We need you to come back to the Castle if you can.”

 

“Why, what’s happened?”

 

“Pidge has been seriously injured! We barely got her to a pod in time!”

 

It was Keith’s turn to grip Matt’s shoulder as he paled. “No! What happened?”

 

“We don’t know. Lance found her in one of the cargo holds, under a fallen stack of boxes. Her internal injuries were catastrophic, but she will be all right! She’ll be in the pod for several quintants but she will make a full recovery.”

 

“We’re on our way,” Keith broke in. Coran nodded and the screen went blank. Keith looked up at Kolivan. “You heard?”

 

“Yes. The timing is troubling. Get back there and keep in touch. Let us know the minute you need support.”

 

“Yes, Kolivan.” Keith ended the connection and stood, ready to move into the pilot’s chair. “Are you okay to fly your ship?”

 

Matt shook his head. “I’ll get Captain Olia to arrange someone to retrieve it. Yours is faster.”

 

Keith nodded and sat down. As he took the controls, he glanced over and caught Matt’s eyes. “She’s gonna be okay.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Hunk heard the running footsteps and stood up from his seat on the stairs. Shiro pushed off from the far wall where he had been slumped. Allura glanced up from the readout on the control panel and stepped away to make room.

 

Keith and Matt sprinted in together. Matt began looking around wildly and Keith grabbed his arm, directing him toward the right cryo-pod. Matt placed both hands on the glass separating him from his sister and breathed in raggedly, exhaling her name. “Katie…” The pain in his voice brought the burn of tears to Hunk’s eyes.

 

Shiro came up to Keith, but before he could say a word Keith turned to Allura. “Are you sure she’ll be all right?”

 

Allura nodded solemnly. “She will. Her injuries were worse than Lance’s, that time he got caught in the bomb blast, but we got her in much sooner. She will be at a hundred per cent when she comes out.”

 

Keith nodded, then jumped and swatted at Shiro’s hand when it landed on his shoulder. He backpedaled from Shiro, and toward Matt.

 

 _What the quiznak?_ Hunk had never seen Keith recoil from Shiro. Shiro frowned, but stayed put.

 

Matt rested his forehead on the glass, closing his eyes. “What happened?”

 

Shiro answered, “We don’t know. We don’t know why she was in the cargo area and we don’t know what happened to make the crates fall.”

 

“So basically you’re stuck until Pidge is out and can tell us what happened. Assuming she saw who attacked her,” Keith snapped.

 

Hunk blinked. He had never, ever heard Keith use that kind of tone with Shiro. His voice practically dripped with venom.

 

Apparently Shiro was just as surprised. He looked a bit hurt, but took a step toward Keith, reaching one hand out again.

 

Matt turned away from the pod and moved to place himself between them. “Have you checked the security cameras around the area? I assume you have such things?”

 

Allura nodded, but Shiro answered first. “There aren’t that many in that section of the Castle, but we’ll have Coran assemble the records.”

 

Hunk was glad no one was looking at him, because he couldn’t stop his eyes from goggling. Shiro had just sent Coran and Lance to the next star system over, claiming that having Pidge in cryo-healing was a good time to deliver some food shipments, check in on the planets just behind the Naxzela line, and find a good neutral meeting place to open negotiations with Lotor. They would be gone for two days. Why would Shiro delay trying to find out what had happened to Pidge? That seemed just as off as Keith and Matt acting like wary cats around him.

 

Or as off as Shiro barely reacting to the news that Keith had apparently been ready to smash his ship into a shield in hopes of stopping the bomb on Naxzela. Pidge had been right, pointing out that Shiro’s attitude had shifted dramatically from when they had first come together and fumbled their way into becoming the Defenders of the Universe.

 

And then Pidge had suffered a devastating accident.

 

Without saying anything, Hunk slipped out and headed for the control room.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Allura moved through the halls toward her room, trying to shake the feeling of emptiness that surrounded her. Part of it was the absence of Coran and Lance, the two most gregarious members of their team. Part of it was knowing Pidge was in a cryo-pod and not somewhere tinkering with her next project. Part of it was questioning Shiro’s acceptance of leaving Lotor to his own devices while they looked for a place to meet face to face.

 

Shiro, Keith, and Matt were probably still in the cryo-room. She expected that Matt would keep vigil there until the others convinced him to get some sleep. Hunk had taken off somewhere, likely to the kitchens to make something. Thinking of some of the tasty results of his “stress-baking”, she retraced her steps there.

 

No intriguing smells drifted in the hall nearby. There was no clatter of pans or humming from Hunk singing to himself as he worked. She stuck her head in to be sure, but the kitchen was indeed empty. Allura retreated, then turned to take the most direct route to her bedroom. She went past the dining hall, a few conference rooms, and then the empty area that had once been the quarters for visiting dignitaries.

 

She stopped short at the unexpected sound of voices.

 

“...sure we can stay here?”

 

“I’m sure. This part of the castle is never used and the room is big enough for the both of us. And it’s close enough to the cryo-room if the alarm gets tripped.”

 

“And you’re sure that thing will work?”

 

“Yes. The Blades use it all the time. The minute anyone goes through the door, we’ll know and can be there in thirty seconds.”

 

“A lot can happen in thirty seconds.”

 

“I know. That’s why I think we should set watches. I can take the first one, if you have any chance of sleeping right now.”

 

A pause. Then the second voice replied, sounding defeated. “I can try. I just… I just got her back, Keith! If...if whoever that is tries to finish the job--”

 

“Then we take him down before he can do it.”

 

“But we can’t kill him. He’s our only lead at finding the real Shiro.”

 

Allura felt her knees buckle and she put one hand to a wall to stay upright. Once she had her balance steady again, she began checking rooms. She found Keith and Matt in the fourth room, Matt sitting on the bed and Keith with a hand on his shoulder. They both jerked, startled, and Keith let his hand fall.

 

“Allura! Sorry, I guess I should have asked about using one of these rooms?”

 

She shook her head, still dazed. “No...I mean, it’s fine. I’m just not sure why you aren’t in your room, Keith.”

 

His expression darkened. “Matt needs support. That’s his sister in the infirmary and this section is closer than my quarters.”

 

She nodded at that. It was a sensible explanation. But with Coran gone, the castle was her responsibility.

 

“I heard you talking. What did you mean by ‘the real Shiro’? Shiro’s here.”

 

Keith shook his head, but Matt was the one to speak. His voice was forceful, almost bitter. “No, he isn’t. Whoever that is, he’s not Shiro. Shiro would be ripping through every last shred of camera footage himself, right now, looking for what happened to Pidge. Shiro would not have shrugged off the fact that Keith almost died trying to stop the Naxzela bomb from going off.”

 

“Keith what?” Allura turned to her former Red Paladin, shocked. “Is that true?”

 

Keith looked down and Allura felt her ears twitching from the surge of worry and anger coursing through her.

 

“Keith, please?”

 

His head snapped up, purple eyes churning. “It seemed like the only option at the time! You all were light-years away, we had no way of knowing Lotor was going to sail in--” Keith frowned in realization. “Wait, where is he anyway?”

 

“Lotor? He said he had a place to hide until we can meet. Coran and I talked to him briefly over the communicators and we think he’s sincere enough about finding a way to work together to bring Zarkon down.”

 

“So he can take his place?”

 

“Actually, Lotor is more interested in keeping a cooperative coalition of his own together than ruling with a dictator’s fist. He realizes that the Galra Empire in its current form is unsustainable.”

 

“Yeah, all well and good, but what about his trying to mine new sources of quintessence?”

 

Allura opened her mouth, then paused. Her eyes grew worried. “That...didn’t come up. I can’t believe we overlooked that!”

 

Keith scowled at her. “If you’d waited for Kolivan--or even me, for that matter--we would have remembered to address it!”

 

Allura frowned in turn and Matt stood, grabbing Keith’s shoulder. “Hey, it’s done. Save it for later. Right now we need to figure out how to neutralize the guy in the castle walking around with Shiro’s face.”

 

“I don’t understand. Why do you think it’s not Shiro?”

 

Matt whirled on her. Keith grabbed him as she stepped back in alarm. This was _not_ the young man who went starry-eyed in her presence.

 

“Did you not hear what I said? Shiro _cares_. Sometimes he cares too much! He put his life on the line for me, taking me out so I couldn’t go into the arena, and I thought he’d _died!_ I thought he’d sacrificed himself for me, for the slimmest chance that they’d send me to the same work camp as my dad! That guy out there? No way he’d do that.”

 

Her own growing unease made her respond more sharply than she intended. “Perhaps things have changed! Shiro’s been through a lot since that time!”

 

“Nothing would change him that much! You didn’t see him and Keith back at the Garrison! There is no way Shiro would have let Keith take off without throwing every possible argument against it out there; I’ve seen it before!”

 

Allura looked at Keith, Matt’s words echoing in her mind. _Seen it before…_

 

_Shiro always near Keith, close enough to touch him. His obvious protectiveness of Keith after the revelation of his heritage…embracing him so closely before departing on separate missions._

 

“Is that...is that how you feel?”

 

Keith pressed his lips together a moment, considering. “I haven’t said anything because I thought _I_ was causing the problems. Leading the team when I wasn’t ready. Trying to get Shiro to pilot Black again. Focusing on Lotor above the coalition stuff. But Matt’s right… there’s been so many times since he returned when what he says or does feels wrong.

 

“And there are things that don’t add up. The first mission the Blade ran after I reported to Shiro about the new quintessence, it was a trap set up for us. He kept warning us away from attacking Haggar’s ship, the one powering the bomb, saying that Naxzela was almost neutralized. The Shiro I know would never turn down backup.”

 

Allura’s eyes widened. “He countermanded Lance… Lance wanted us to leave the minute the pylons appeared, but Shiro said we should find out more. That delay is what caught us inside the gravitational field.”

 

“Not totally unreasonable, but if I’d been in Shiro’s place I still would have moved away from the planet. Pidge and Hunk can do plenty of investigating from a distance.”

 

Allura nodded, feeling more and more convinced of what they were saying. “But...why did the Black Lion accept him if he isn’t Shiro?”

 

“Black didn’t, not at first. Remember the mission in the Ulippa System? I was going to stay behind but Black wouldn’t move for him. I think the only reason he did later was because I wasn’t there and you all were in a life-threatening situation.”

 

Allura nodded at that, worrying her lip. “That is possible.”

 

Matt began pacing around the room. “If we are dealing with the same Shiro, but brainwashed or reprogrammed, then the Black Lion may have simply been reacting to the fact that it wasn’t you the first time. If he’s a clone, then Black may have needed more time to find Shiro’s core DNA in the construct.”

 

“Clone? What’s that?”

 

Both men looked at her in surprise. Matt halted and asked, “You aren’t familiar with cloning technology? Back on Earth we’ve been able to clone plants, even animals--the ability to duplicate life at a cellular level has advanced our medicine in so many ways.”

 

“Duplicate...at a cellular level? You mean, make another being from cells of the original?” Such a possibility ran counter to everything Allura knew.

 

Keith nodded. “Most of our governments declared that trying to clone a person was morally wrong, but the theory is sound. If the Galra can do this…” Keith paled suddenly. “His arm. What if that’s why they took his arm and replaced it with the cybernetic one? Shiro never said how it happened, if it was from an injury in the arena or what.”

 

“But how would they get Shiro’s memories? This guy remembers everything up to the battle with Zarkon, right?” Matt resumed pacing.

 

Keith was about to say something, then his face went white. “Oh, no. Pidge and Hunk, they said something about Shiro’s memories, when we were debating about whether to trust Ulaz…”

 

Allura recalled the conversation, Pidge and Hunk’s voices echoing in her mind:

 

_“The Galra could have implanted fake memories of the escape in your head.”_

 

_“Oh, come on, that would be so evil, which, of course, they are. But they'd have to come up with some molecular level storage unit, which his hand does have. But, to be linked up to memory, it would need a direct pathway to his brain, which... yeah.”_

 

“We have to find a way to get him into a pod,” she mused out loud. “It scans over everything looking for injuries, plus we can compare the data to the time he was healed before.”

 

“We should have insisted on a pod when we found this guy. He had an injured leg, he was dehydrated and starved and almost dead,” Keith almost growled.

 

Allura felt a pang in her heart, remembering Keith’s joy at the time and how solicitous he had been while Shiro spent days recovering...because Shiro had maintained that a pod wasn’t necessary.

 

“All right. I think I believe you, or I agree that something is wrong. What do you need from me?”

 

“Can you recall Coran and Lance? And do everything you can not to be alone around this guy.”

 

“I can have the mice conduct surveillance, too. But contacting Coran and Lance will be tricky - Shiro ordered radio silence so the Galra couldn’t find them easily. It’s possible to get a message through on a different frequency, but--”

 

“That’s Pidge’s area of expertise,” Keith finished with her. “You don’t think Hunk can do it?”

 

“I don’t know. His work is much more machine-oriented.” Allura bit her lip as the potential danger of the situation sank in. What if this potentially false Shiro had caused Pidge’s injuries precisely for this reason?

 

“Can I take a look? I might be able to do it.”

 

Both Keith and Allura looked at Matt in surprise. A grin burst across Keith’s face and Allura threw her arms around him.

 

“Oh, I am so glad Pidge found you!” Without thinking, she planted a kiss on his cheek. “I love having you on the team!”

 

She heard Keith make a choking sound behind her, as if holding in laughter, and pulled back to find Matt blushing a deeper crimson than the Red Lion. Keith moved forward, patting him on the back and grinning even more widely. He turned to Allura, who could feel her own face getting hot.

 

“So, Princess, what will you give me not to tell Lance about this?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Allurance has definitely grown on me through S3-S4, but I could easily develop a thing for Mallura...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks once again to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) for the beta help!
> 
> I'm on Twitter and Tumblr as avidbeader - come say him!

 

After a quick debate, they pulled the widest, plushiest sofa and some extra bedding from another ambassadorial room into the room they had taken so the three of them could keep watch together. Telling Allura about their suspicions over Shiro not being Shiro had keyed them all up; no one was ready to sleep. Keith volunteered to go find Hunk and possibly Pidge’s tablet so Matt could start trying to contact the others.

 

Allura curled up on one end of the sofa and tried not to look at Matt too much. He had begun playing with some tassels that hung from the room’s curtains, braiding and unbraiding them with deft fingers. When he started tying different knots, she let out a small laugh. He looked up at her, his cheeks turning pink again.

 

“Sorry. It feels unnatural not to have something to do.”

 

“It’s all right. I understand. But you’re making me jumpy by doing that. Come sit. I want to ask you something.”

 

Matt scrubbed the back of his head self-consciously, but obeyed. “Okay, what is it?”

 

“You said Shiro wouldn’t have let Keith leave without arguing against it. That you’d seen it before. What did you mean?”

 

“Tell me first, did that actually happen? Shiro just let Keith leave?”   
  


“Well, the first time it happened, Keith and I left without telling anyone. We were trying to find out how Zarkon was tracking us. I thought it was me. Keith thought it was him. Pidge’s theory was the Black Lion, since Zarkon was the original Black Paladin.”

 

Matt’s eyebrows shot up at that bit of information, but let her continue.

 

“At the time, when the others found out, Shiro demanded that we return. He correctly pointed out that we are stronger when we’re together. But Keith and I waited--we both needed to know for sure. Then we got word that the Galra were attacking Taujeer, the planet where the others were, and made our way back.” She glossed over the pod exploding and those moments of terror before Keith managed to get to her. “We apologized for our actions first, so we didn’t get a lecture, but Shiro was clearly upset that we had left.”

 

“That sounds like him. I bet he found an opportunity to talk to Keith alone later. He’d do that--Shiro knows how much Keith hates being the center of attention, even if it’s for a good reason. Anyway, what happened this time?”

 

“Keith began doing some training with the Blade of Marmora. We supported it at first, because Keith did earn his place with them. And as focused as he is on improving his combat skills, it made sense. But the next thing we knew, he was actually going on missions with them, risking his life. Things came to a head when we were needed to help a convoy that was being attacked. It went badly and we were outnumbered without Voltron. That was when Shiro reconnected… that was when the Black Lion worked for him.

 

“We were all furious with Keith when he returned. But when we had gotten our shouting out of our system and were waiting for him to apologize, he turned it around, pointing out that Shiro was able to fly Black again. Admitted he’d been trying to force the issue, return Shiro to full leadership. And then he explained about the Blade’s infiltration mission to trace the new quintessence, and saying he needed to go with them.

 

“I expected Shiro to argue, but instead he said, ‘If you feel this is what you have to do, we won’t try and stop you, but know that we’re here for you.’ And then they hugged each other, but it wasn’t quite like I’ve seen them hug before. Not as close. Almost like...Shiro was doing what was expected of him more than genuinely feeling it. Or maybe he was secretly relieved because he had reestablished his bond with his lion and Keith wasn’t going to fight him over who should be Black’s pilot.” Allura looked down. “Or perhaps I’m overthinking it.”

 

“No, don’t fight your instincts! I think you’re onto something. The Shiro I knew would have tried to stop Keith.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

_ Matt had never thought much about his favorite corner of the library being next to the faculty offices. He liked it because it was reasonably close to most of the sections he frequented and was tucked away enough that very few people came here. He was expecting Keith any minute for some shared study time. Speaking of which, he needed the microbiology text that Professor Hedrick had mentioned… _

 

_ Book in hand, Matt headed back to his corner, but stopped short when he saw Keith standing there, close to the exit doors that were standing ajar, voices floating through. _

 

_ “I’m telling you, it’s only a matter of time. Kogane just keeps smashing records left and right. If he were even a couple years older, had some more experience under his belt, he’d be in the running for Kerberos.” _

 

_ “Oh, come on, Riley. The fact that they chose Shirogane to pilot is pushing it already! He’ll barely be twenty-four if Kerberos leaves on schedule. Kogane’s what, sixteen?” _

 

_ “And possibly the most gifted pilot in generations. Shirogane’s got the luck of timing--he may go down in the history books for Kerberos, but it’ll be the last major mission he flies. The next big missions will go to Kogane, mark my words.” _

 

_ Movement drew Matt’s eye and he saw Keith shaking his head, his face ashen and his eyes huge. He snatched up his bag from the chair where he had set it and took off between shelves. _

 

_ Shiro...Matt had to find Shiro and fast. _

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

_ Shiro and Matt found Keith in his room, hastily separating his uniforms from his own clothes and packing his belongings in a creased duffle bag he had probably taken from the lost & found. He shoved something wrapped in a sweatshirt into the bag and turned as they entered. “What do you want?” _

 

_ Shiro looked from the piles of clothing to Keith, dressed in shabby jeans and a red tee. “I want to know why you’re packing. It looks like you’re leaving the Garrison.” _

 

_ Keith wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Yeah. I need to move on.” _

 

_ Shiro moved forward in two strides and put his hands on Keith’s shoulders and turning him so they faced one another. “Move on from what? Keith, this is your future! This is what you were born to do! There is no one in the Garrison, no one who’s been through for the last twenty years, that can hold a candle to you.” _

 

_ Keith pushed at Shiro’s hands. “That’s ridiculous! If anyone is going to shine here it’s  _ **_you_ ** _ , not some problem reject kid who couldn’t even keep his own dad from leaving…” _

 

_ Matt caught his breath as Keith’s voice wavered. He had put together a bit of Keith’s history, of bouncing around foster homes before a chance meeting with Shiro had helped him set his sights on the Garrison. He had not known that Keith’s dad had apparently abandoned him. _

 

_ Shiro was having none of it. He pulled Keith into him, tightening his arms and running one hand over his hair. “Come on, Keith, you know that wasn’t your fault. Being the best pilot in decades isn’t a fault, either. It’s talent. And you need to do whatever you can to grow that talent.” _

 

_ “Even if it means taking your place? I won’t do it, Shiro! It’s been your dream to go into space! I’m not taking that from you!” _

 

_ Confusion spread across Shiro’s face, even as he held Keith. “How could you possibly take that from me?” _

 

_ Matt’s throat was so tight it hurt, but he worked the words out. “We heard a couple of the professors talking. They were saying that the only reason Keith hadn’t been selected for Kerberos instead of you was his age.” _

 

_ Shiro brightened as understanding morphed into delight. “Keith, that’s great! That puts you at the top for the next space mission! Commander Holt wants to push for Europa after Kerberos. They’re thinking of establishing a manned satellite with expeditions to the surface. They’re going to need pilots capable of ferrying the scientists down and back.” _

 

_ Keith looked up at that, eyes still shiny with unshed tears. “Pilots? More than one?” _

 

_ “Yes, more than one pilot. Regs about downtime between active flights still hold in space and we wouldn’t be able to use autopilot between a space station and the surface of a planet. We could fly out together and take turns playing chauffeur to a bunch of nerdy ice gatherers--” _

 

_ “Hey!” Matt couldn’t help it. _

 

_ But Shiro and Keith both laughed at that and Shiro let Keith pull away and sit on a pile of uniforms on his bed. “Okay, so I’m not taking your place. But, Shiro, how do they know I can do it? No one’s ever expected anything good from me before.” _

 

_ “I beg your pardon. I’ve always expected great things from you.” _

 

_ Keith waved a hand at him. “You’re different. I mean people like the teachers, or Iverson. What happens if I screw up in front of them?” _

 

_ One corner of Shiro’s mouth twisted up in a rueful smile. “You do what anyone does, what I did. You pick yourself up and fix it.” _

 

_ “What you did? What did you do?” _

 

_ Matt was glad Keith had asked, because this sounded like promising new dirt on Shiro. _

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Allura nodded as Matt finished, looking thoughtful. “I see what you mean. That sounds like Shiro from before his disappearance and definitely not like Shiro after.” She glanced at the door “I hope Keith has found Hunk by now. I don’t like us being separated like this.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

From his station on the command deck, Hunk glanced over his shoulder nervously, waiting for the last files from the security cameras to download.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : If you recognize the character, it isn't mine. Just playing in Dreamworks' sandbox.
> 
>  **Note** : I'm on Twitter and Tumblr as avidbeader. Come say hi!
> 
> Thanks as always to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) for her valuable input!

 

 

As he waited for the progress bar to fill, Hunk kept checking the doors. It had taken him longer than expected to find the correct security cameras--he wasn’t as familiar with the castle’s programming as Pidge. The longer he took, the more exposed the command deck felt and now he was moving the files onto a tablet so he could review the footage in the cryo-room and keep an eye on her.

 

Squeaking echoed in the large room and two of the mice scrambled up to the console, jumping up and down.

 

**_Be alert._ **

 

Hunk jerked at the Yellow Lion’s mental warning and pulled up a second screen showing schematics of the Castle’s main cannons. He’d been working on ways to strengthen them in his spare time. He minimized the screen with the download going and began poking his control panel.

 

“Hey, Hunk. Have you seen Keith?”

 

Hunk lifted his head but kept his eyes on the screen. He knew he was a terrible actor and worse liar. His only shot was not making eye contact.

 

“Not since the cryo-room, sorry.”

 

“If you see him, tell him I’m looking for him, okay?”

 

“Sure.”

 

There was a pause. “Everything okay?”

 

“Yeah, sure. Just working on this.” Hunk could feel the anxiety in his chest, threatening to make his voice waver if he kept talking. He clamped his lips together.

 

After another agonizing minute, he heard footsteps moving away, but waited until the mice slumped down in relief before relaxing and sighing. He reopened the screen. Seeing the completed download, he picked up the tablet. Then it occurred to him that one more thing might be a good idea and he fetched it.

 

He tucked the tablet into the crook of his arm and held his free hand out to the mice so they could scramble up to his shoulder. “Shall we?”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

_Where’s Keith? I need to talk to him._

 

He moved through the empty corridors, constantly looking around as his boots echoed on the floors. The castle had never felt so empty before. Organizing the resistance on Olkarion, he had gotten used to lots of people being around.

 

_Matt said Keith almost killed himself trying to stop the battleship. But it’s okay, he’s okay. I just need to talk to him. He’s the only one who might understand._

 

He had been getting better. He hadn’t had any nightmares of the arena since returning to the team. His dreams were scattered, unsettling, but not jarring him awake in terror. He wasn’t having flashbacks. The headaches were annoying, but bearable. He had been getting better.

 

But he was losing time. Chunks of it. He’d be in one place, then suddenly elsewhere minutes later and not remember what he’d been doing.

 

The latest one had been the worst yet. He had left Pidge and Hunk after Matt’s outburst, hoping to find Keith and check on him before he returned to the Blade. The next thing he remembered, he was in a hallway near the cargo bays, hurrying back toward their quarters and it was over half a varga later.

 

Sometime during that timespan Pidge had nearly been killed.

 

And now Keith was pulling away from him. He had visibly flinched in the cryo-room at being touched and instantly put space between them. Why would he do that?

 

_I need to talk to Keith. He’s the only one._

 

The connection to Black felt shaky, thready, less in sync than before. And after Naxzela, it had only gotten worse... He genuinely feared what might happen the next time the team had to fight.

 

Find him. He’s the most likely one. 

 

He halted, trying to pinpoint the source of the thought. Yes, he wanted Keith. He wanted to talk to Keith. But why now? Why was it so important to find him?

 

He ran his cybernetic hand down his flesh arm. Something was wrong there. What was it?

 

Find the Red Paladin. 

 

Lance? Or Keith? But Keith wasn’t a paladin at all now? Pain shot through his head and he pressed his hands to his skull, trying to ease it.

 

Find him. 

 

Maybe if he tried bonding with Black again, like he had before. He risked running into Zarkon on the astral plane, but Black had helped him before. He trusted Black. Supposedly Black trusted him as well.

 

The nagging insistence to find Keith faded.  Yes. The lion. Go to the lion. 

 

He entered the hangar, unaware of a mouse’s tiny gaze on him from the vents above. The Black Lion did not lower his head for him and he had to enter from the hatch below the chest area. He climbed to the cockpit and sat in the pilot’s chair. He placed his hands on the steering poles.

  
“Hey, Black. I thought we could use some time to ourselves.”

 

**_No._ **

 

With that abrupt declaration, Black’s presence vanished from his mind.

 

“Wait. WAIT! What’s wrong? What did I do?” He tugged at the controls but they were completely unresponsive in his hands. “Black, please!”

 

His Galra hand began glowing and he looked at it with huge eyes.

 

_No! I control it! I--_

 

A tiny comm screen popped up from the back of the hand. “Base to Kuron.”

 

He froze, then his lips moved under their own volition. “Kuron acknowledges.”

 

“If the lion has ceased responding to you, use the other. Find him. Have him pilot. Bring us the lion.”

 

“Kuron acknowledges.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Lance was antsy as he sat beside Coran, who was currently piloting the pod. He had found Shiro’s plan for the two of them to make this supply run odd--they had a planet full of Olkari willing to help along with a rebel fleet. But Shiro had insisted that he and Coran do this.

 

**_Come back._ **

 

Lance jerked, startling Coran and making him steer off course briefly. “What is it, Number Three?”

 

“I...I thought I heard my lion calling.”

 

Coran gave him a sideways glance. “Highly unlikely. Keith and the Red Lion were the only ones who seemed to be able to connect across such a distance. Although…perhaps you and the lion are finally bonded enough to do the same.”

 

Lance shook his head, because something felt different. Familiar.

 

_Wait...Blue?_

 

**_Come back!_ **

 

“Um, Coran...I think we need to turn around. Something’s wrong!”

 

“We can’t just throw our plans away. Let me contact...hold on a tic. Shiro wanted us to keep silent on the comms.”

 

Okay, now Lance was more than antsy. He was worried. “We’re going back.These deliveries aren’t critical and we can send them with some Olkari volunteers or rebel ships. We need to get back _now._ ”

 

Coran looked at him, uncertain, but hit the switch that transferred pilot control to Lance’s panels. He grabbed the steering arms and brought the pod around.

 

_We’re coming, beautiful!_

 

**_Hurry!_ **

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Keith was getting nervous. He had thought it would be a simple thing to fetch Hunk, but he was nowhere to be found. Not in the kitchen. Not in the Yellow Lion’s bay. Not in his room. Keith had taken the opportunity to check Pidge’s room for her tablet and was now knee deep in the incredible mess. A pair of fuzzy floating jelly beans watched as he shifted a junk sculpture that seemed to capture Lance at his wide-eyed worst.

 

Finally, he located her tablet, under her pillow of all places. Keith debated briefly, and decided to take the tablet to Matt so he could start working on contacting Coran and Lance. Then he would try again to find Hunk.

 

As he left Pidge’s room, a voice stopped him in his tracks.

 

“Keith! There you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you. I need you to come with me.”

 

Keith fought to keep his voice steady. He had no idea who he was talking to. The real Shiro, under control of the Galra? A clone that might or might not be aware of his origin? A sleeper agent that would turn on him with one wrong word or move?

 

“Why? What’s wrong?”

 

“Black isn’t responding to me. I need you to try and talk to him.”

 

“Why do you think Black would respond to me? You’re his paladin.”

 

“Look, all I know is that Black isn’t responding to me and you’re the only other person on this ship that he has responded to. Please, I need your help!”

 

Every instinct Keith had was screaming not to listen. But the last sentence sliced straight into his heart. If there was any chance this was still Shiro, Keith had to try. He just needed to be smart about it. He tried for a logical response that would get him some backup. “Okay, okay. Just let me take this to Matt.” He started down the hall.

 

Even though he had steeled himself for the possibility, Keith was not prepared for the force behind the attack. Shiro had always pulled his punches in sparring when it came to the robotic arm, trying his best to find Keith’s upper limit without seriously injuring him. This time the tablet was swatted from his hands at full strength, ripping it away and sending it to the floor with a crash that shattered it.

 

Keith dodged the first grab, hoping to be able to run for it, but bounced off the wall of the narrow hallway instead of getting a clean start. A hand snagged his jacket and hauled him back. He tried to slip out of the jacket; if he could only get free he could make a break for it. He was still significantly faster than Shiro. But fingers seized him by the hair and flung him into the wall, driving the air from his lungs as his scalp sizzled in pain.

 

“Shiro!” he managed to gasp out before the hands yanked him close, one twisting a wrist up and behind his back painfully, the other--the metal one--curling around his throat. His attacker dipped his head and spoke, lips brushing against his ear.

 

“Now, about the Black Lion…”

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: If you recognize the character, it isn't mine. Just playing in Dreamworks' sandbox.
> 
> Note: I'm on Twitter and Tumblr as avidbeader. Come say hi!
> 
> Thanks as always to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) for her valuable input!

 

 

Matt was playing with the tassels on the bed curtains again. As Allura watched, he made the knots more complicated and drew them tighter. Every minute that passed with no sign of Keith or Hunk was feeding the tension in the room.

 

Finally Matt gave the cord a particularly vicious jerk and flung it away. “Stars, is there not _any_ intership communication here?  No way to see who’s where?”

 

Allura shook her head. “The best I could do is a ship-wide all-call. There is some station-to-station communication between key areas of the ship, but that’s really it. We used to have person-to-person communication through devices we carried. We haven’t brought those back because the paladin armor has those devices built in. We need to fix that.”

 

“We also need to find Keith and Hunk, neither of whom is wearing armor!”

 

“But isn’t it better for at least one party to stay--” Allura’s protest was interrupted by a sudden whine from a small black disc lying on the nightstand next to the bed.

 

Matt snatched it up and sprinted for the door. “Pidge!”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Hunk tiptoed into the cryo-room. He wasn’t sure why he felt the need, but it was so quiet here. He’d expected to see Matt and Keith chatting, or Allura checking the readouts, or Shiro standing to the side the way he often did these days when he wasn’t directing them.

 

But the room was empty, except for Pidge sleeping inside the one raised cryo-pod. Hunk wandered over, looking in and down at her. She was already the smallest of them all by a head, only coming up to Keith’s shoulder, and the cryo-pod made her look even tinier.

 

Hunk put one hand to the glass. “We need you, Pidge. Heal up fast.”

 

The mice squeaked a warning, which was the only reason Hunk didn’t jump a mile when Matt and Allura burst into the room, a high-pitched tone sounding from something in Matt’s hand. Allura breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, Hunk, it’s just you. Where’s Keith?”

 

“How should I know? I haven’t seen him since you two got back.”

 

Matt pulled a tiny sensor from the edge of the door and the noise stopped. “Okay, I’m officially worried sick. Keith’s been gone close to a varga looking for you, Hunk.”

 

“Me? Why?”

 

“Safety in numbers,” Allura cut in, moving over to check the controls of the cryo-pod. “At least he hasn’t gone after Pidge again.”

 

“And we know the trip alarm works,” Matt added.

 

“Okay, what the quiznak is going on?”

 

Allura laid a hand on his shoulder. “Something’s wrong about Shiro.”

 

“Well, duh! Keith’s acting like he’s a bomb about to go off and Shiro’s just taking it instead of talking it out. Plus his orders aren’t making sense anymore--he sent Coran and Lance off when we could have done everything with the castle instead of splitting up. Plus Coran is the other person who’d be efficient about looking up the security camera footage.” Hunk lifted the tablet. “Took me forever to isolate the right ones and download everything.”

 

Matt’s eyes lit up. “Let me see!” He grabbed the tablet and sat on the steps, poking at the screen.

 

Allura noticed Hunk’s other hand. “Why are you carrying your bayard?”

 

Hunk glanced down, then up. “I just... I feel better having it.”

 

Allura nodded with an expression that said she wished for her bayard right now as well.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Keith did his best to keep his footing, but his captor was hurrying him and making him stumble down the corridor. He had both Keith’s wrists pinned behind his back with his left hand and the cool metal of the prosthetic never left his throat. He didn’t remember Shiro’s Galra arm being that cold. As they crossed the threshold into Black’s hangar, the stranger with Shiro’s face and glowing purple eyes practically dragged him across the floor. He paused and hauled Keith up as he nearly fell, glaring in anger at Black.

 

Black was surrounded by his force field.

 

Keith finally tried speaking. “What are we doing here?”

 

“You’re going to fly the Black Lion to the rendezvous point.”

 

“What rendezvous? And Black’s not going to let me fly him anywhere.”

 

“Yes, it will. And we’re meeting up with the ship I came from. They’ve prepared it to hold the Black Lion for Zarkon. And you as well.”

 

“Me?”

 

“They think Zarkon would welcome the opportunity to meet the one that kept him from reclaiming the lion, considering Prisoner 117-9875 is out of reach. And there’s the added benefit of being able to interrogate a member of the elusive Blade of Marmora.”

 

“Wait, what do you mean, out of reach? If they don’t have Shiro, where is he? Why would they send you if there was a chance he’d turn up?”

 

“They waited. They waited months as they perfected me. Then they activated the programming and set me on a path to see what would happen.” He looked down at Keith and the glow behind his eyes faded a little. “They just threw me out there, no support, no instructions. All I knew was I had to get back to Voltron. Back to you.”

 

Keith inhaled sharply. For that brief moment, it had sounded like Shiro again.

 

Then he winced, as if in pain, and the eyes began glimmering again. “Enough. Tell the lion to drop the force field.”

 

_Don’t do it, Black!_

 

**_Paladin…_ **

 

Despite the dangerous situation, Keith felt a warmth in his chest at the title. _I’ll figure something out. Don’t lower your shield!_

 

The man pulled Keith in front of him. The fingers around his throat began to heat up and the grip tightened, threatening to crack fragile, necessary bones. “Let us in if you want him to live.”

 

Black’s eyes flashed gold. He lifted his head and roared, the sound making the entire room shake.

 

In the distance, Keith heard the other lions respond.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Matt had found the files from the cameras and was watching them at double-speed, his eyes narrowed as he searched. Allura was pacing the room and Hunk was poking at the controls of an unused cryo-pod.

 

The mice began squeaking and Matt spotted a third mouse running across the floor toward Allura. She knelt and stared at it, apparently listening to it intently and understanding it.

 

She picked the mouse up and set it on Hunk’s broad shoulder with the others. “Chuchule says that Shiro went to the Black Lion some time ago. He came back out and something was different about him.”

 

“Like what?” Hunk asked.

 

Allura shook her head. “I’m not sure. I’m going to lock down Pidge’s pod, where no one can get at her.” She touched a few controls and the cryo-pod sank into the floor. “Now we can try to find Keith before Shiro does.”

 

Hunk’s head snapped up, as if he had heard something. Allura did the same.

 

“What is it?” Matt looked up from the tablet.

 

Hunk replied, “It’s the lions! What are they doing?”

 

The castle trembled as roars echoed in from all sides.

 

“What is it? Where do we go?” Allura cried.

 

“Black’s hangar! Come on!” Hunk hauled Matt to his feet and they tore out of the room.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Roaring...the lions were roaring. Even though he couldn’t feel Black in his head anymore, the fury was unmistakable.

 

The fury was directed at him.

 

It had happened again. He had been in Black and the lion had shut him out. Now he was outside the lion with no memory of leaving. His Galra hand was hot. It was…

 

It was clamped around Keith’s throat!

 

Keith was looking up at him, frightened and...worried? Was Keith actually concerned about him? Did he realize what was happening?

 

_I have to stop this. I have to protect them._

 

He tried to make his fingers loosen, but they wouldn’t budge. His head throbbed as he tried to force the hand open.

 

He switched tactics and concentrated on the rest of his body. His other arm and legs weren’t locked up like the Galra hand. He narrowed his stance and Keith’s eyes widened, sensing the change.

 

_Come on, Keith! Remember!_

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

_Keith looked up at Shiro, arms crossed and a sullen look on his face. “This isn’t gonna work. Everyone else is bigger than me except a couple of the girls. There’s no way I’m going to be able to do anything against them and I’m going to flunk the test.”_

 

_“No, you’re not. I’ll help you. If you can get the throws down with me, you’ll be able to take anyone in the class, first or second year.”_

 

_“You’re just going to go easy on me.”_

 

_“While I’m showing you, yes. Relax, okay? It’s just a matter of learning a different style from all the punching and clawing that you do right now.”_

 

_“It works for me!”_

 

_“Until you’re fighting someone who’s thinking enough to dodge instead of meet force with force. Work with me, Keith. Of all things, combat skills should not be the class that trips you up. You’ve just got to apply that clever brain to your brawn.”_

 

_Keith huffed, blowing his bangs out of his eyes. “Fine. Have at it.”_

 

_“Thank you. First lesson: you need to take advantage of your lower center of gravity when you can.” Shiro moved around to stand behind Keith. He reached around Keith’s neck with one hand, and grabbed his wrist with the other, pulling it up and behind him slightly. Shiro settled into a wide stance. “Okay, feel around. See if there’s any point where you can shift my weight.”_

 

_Keith tried, finding a little leeway inside the circle of Shiro’s arm, but the hold on his wrist would hurt him if he moved too much. The best he could do was get his head partway out by shoving Shiro’s elbow up with his free hand, but Shiro was too strong for him and kept him in place. “Ugh, it’s hopeless!”_

 

_Shiro did something with his feet and Keith felt a difference. Shiro’s balance wasn’t quite so solid. If Keith could use that and somehow pull down, he might be able to get Shiro to fall._

 

_He thought for a second, planning the moves. In a real situation he would have to react instantly and prevent an attacker from getting a firm hold on him, but this wasn’t real. This was Shiro giving him the chance to work it out._

 

_He made his decisions and acted. He went for Shiro’s elbow again, shoving up and across. At the same moment he brought one leg up behind Shiro’s knee, breaking his balance. Shiro tried to pull him down with him, but Keith landed in a crouch and pushed, getting his head free and letting himself tumble backward until he was clear enough to scramble to his feet._

 

_Shiro laughed. “That’s it! The second the other person gets careless about their position because they think they’ve got you, find the tipping point and use it.”_

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

“Sir! We’re losing control!” The tech’s hands darted across the monitoring panel. “The subject almost released the Red Paladin!”

 

The lead scientist looked up at the screens that showed the view from the optics and then at a readout monitoring the level of various chemicals in the clone’s natural system. “I told him! I told Commander Bezir we shouldn’t have made him attack another paladin. The emotional reaction is overriding his programming. Stay in place for the moment, but be ready to activate the failsafe.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Keith dropped his weight without warning. The metal hurt as it was driven up into his jaws but he broke the hold on his wrists and got one hand free. Grabbing the Galra arm for leverage, Keith hooked one foot behind a knee and sent his assailant sprawling. He let himself be dragged down and used the momentum to roll over and past the other, pulling free of his grasp.

 

**_Paladin! Here!_ **

 

Keith obeyed, diving toward Black, and the force field opened a gap just large enough for him to get through before closing up again. His attacker was a split-second behind but bounced off.

 

“NO!” He pounded on the shield, sending ripples through the bubble.

 

Keith wasn’t the best at words, but from the safety of Black’s shield, he tried. “Shiro? Are you in there? Can you hear me?”

 

The clone, if what he had said was true, backed up a step and the vivid violet light in the eyes began to flicker. “Keith? I’m sorry, Keith! I didn’t know!”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

The commander stared at the lead scientist for a moment. “You’re sure there’s no other option?”

 

“I don’t see one, sir. The unit was designed for independent thought and action. Once we released it from our control, there was always a chance that it would adapt and shift from its programming. Frankly we’ve gotten months more than I expected. But now it will continue to fight us and we cannot effectively reprogram it from here.”

 

“Very well. Initiate abort sequence. With luck it will take out a lion or two, possibly even the Altean ship itself when it goes.”

 

The scientist raised his hand to his shoulder. “Vrepit sa.”

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: If you recognize the character, it isn't mine. Just playing in Dreamworks' sandbox.
> 
> Note: I'm on Twitter and Tumblr as avidbeader. Come say hi!
> 
> Thanks as always to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) for her valuable input!

 

 

He felt a spike of pain drive through his head as Keith watched him from behind the shelter of Black’s force field, his eyes filled with confusion and hurt. That damned comm screen popped up, showing a series of Galra numbers.

 

“Failsafe engaged. Unit will self-destruct in one hundred tics. Operation Kuron is terminated.”

 

As the numbers began moving, the entire prosthetic grew hot under his armor, purple glimmering through in places. Now Keith was the one pounding the lion’s shield. “NO! Let me out, Black!”

 

_Don’t let him out! Keep him safe!_

 

He thought wildly, looking for any possibility. The exit to Black’s hangar was hundreds of meters above and the jetpack in his armor was not powerful enough to reach it. The pods were floors away and the route to the cargo entrances went through half-a-dozen doors that all needed a voice command to open. The clearest exit, through the grand entrance, was on the fortieth floor. And even if he did manage to get out of the castle, there wasn’t enough time to put distance between himself and the Olkari camp surrounding it.

 

Eighty tics.

 

Keith was still trying to convince Black to let him out and from a distance he could hear Red’s roar… Could Red fly in and pull him out, flinging him away from the ship and the camp? Red was the only one that might be fast enough…

 

Seventy tics.

 

The heat from the Galra arm was intensifying and he held it away from himself, racking his brain for any possibility. Pain jolted his skull again.

 

Sixty tics.

 

Suddenly Keith’s face morphed into horror, looking past him. He spun around.

 

Hunk, Allura, and Matt were charging into the hangar.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

As they burst in, Matt skidded to a halt, taking in the situation in milliseconds. Keith was alive and safe for the moment, separated from the not-Shiro by a force field around the Black Lion. But the reddened skin and darkening bruises on his neck spoke of his friend coming too close to death yet again. Keith spotted them and yelled, “Get out! GET OUT OF HERE!”

 

And then he saw the countdown.

 

He tried to grab both Allura and Hunk by the arm to pull them back and out. He got Allura but missed Hunk. “It’s a bomb! It’s going to go off!”

 

Without hesitation, Hunk raised his bayard and fired, taking the not-Shiro down.

 

He collapsed to the floor but the glowing panel barely flickered. Matt watched with dread as the countdown continued to decrease, numbers hovering above the hand.

 

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Between the damage from near-strangulation and his shouted protests, Keith felt like knives were being driven down his throat. But when he saw the others enter the hangar, Keith screamed at them through the pain. “Get out! GET OUT OF HERE!”

 

Instead Hunk lifted his bayard, his cannon taking shape, and fired, sending the man to the floor. He didn’t move and Keith felt his heart turn to ice--one of his worst nightmares had just played out in front of him and it didn’t matter if the one who died wasn’t actually Shiro. The man had thought he was Shiro, had tried his best to lead them.

 

Black’s shield vanished and Keith ran for the body, falling beside it.

 

The still-breathing body. Hunk’s bayard had been set to stun. Keith reached out and stretched the arm away from his side, grimacing at the heat coming through the armor. He looked for some way, any way of dismantling it, barely aware of the others’ cries of warning.

 

Thirty tics.

 

**_MOVE, PALADIN!_ **

 

Keith flung himself away. Matt sprang forward and got his hands under Keith’s arms, dragging him back.

 

Twenty tics.

 

And then Black raised one giant paw and brought it down. The entire ship shuddered with the impact.

 

“NO! SHIRO!”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Hunk knew it was useless if Black’s actions hadn’t stopped the bomb, but he jumped forward and tried to shield the others. Allura was on the other side, trying to hold Keith in place as he fought Matt’s grasp. Hunk kept a count going in his head and when he reached sixty, he felt confident enough to release them.

 

“I think... I think Black did it.”

 

Tears were streaming down Allura’s face as she held onto Keith, who was also crying.

 

Black lifted his paw and Hunk looked away reflexively, his stomach roiling at the thought of seeing Shiro’s smashed, bloody body. Even if it wasn’t really Shiro.

 

Then he heard someone gasp, and the gasp sounded like hope?

 

The others were scrambling to their feet and running toward...a body. A body that was minus an arm, but otherwise unbroken.

 

Hunk stood and stared in wonder. Black’s strike had been perfectly placed, shearing off the cybernetic arm with millimeters to spare and pulverizing it.

 

Keith collapsed next to him and put fingers to his neck, feeling for a pulse. “He’s alive!”

 

Hunk winced at just how horrible Keith’s voice sounded. Then he noticed blood trickling from under the guy’s eyelids. “We need to get him to a pod! We don’t know what else is in there that might hurt him!”

 

He moved in and slid his shoulder under the right one. Keith draped his left arm over his own shoulders. Matt got his arms under the knees and they all stood.

 

Allura huffed. “I could help, you know!”

 

Hunk shot back, “Of course you could, but now you can go ahead of us and get a cryo-pod open.”

 

Allura’s eyes narrowed, but she spun and ran from the room.

 

Matt started walking, and they fell in step with him, everyone huffing slightly. Matt began chuckling and looked back at Keith. “Deadweight Shiro is still a pain, even if he is down an arm.”

 

Keith let out a croaking laugh, wincing as he did so.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

_Matt pulled up Keith’s number on his phone and dialed. He waited for several rings, praying it wouldn’t go to messaging before Keith woke and picked up. Finally there was a sleepy voice. “Holt, I’m going to kill you. It’s two-fucking-hundred hours.”_

 

_“I know, I’m sorry, but I need your help. We’re at the south gate, a cab dropped us off--”_

 

_“Us?”_

 

_“Shiro’s with me and he’s out cold. I need you to help me carry him to his room.”_

 

_In the background he could hear Keith moving, and when he spoke his voice was more distant, as if he’d set the phone down to throw on clothes. “What the hell happened?”_

 

_“His first flight team was there. They took turns buying him drinks. And you know how low his tolerance is.”_

 

_“And this is why you shouldn’t go to parties if I’m not invited, too. I’d’ve stopped that shit. Are you sure he hasn’t got alcohol poisoning?”_

 

_“Yes, I’m sure. His breathing and heart rate are fine, no signs at all of seizure, no vomiting. He just needs to sleep it off and I’m sure he’d be much more comfortable in his bed rather than on this bench outside the gates.”_

 

_Keith’s voice got stronger as he brought the phone back to his ear and a door closed in the background. “I’m on my way.”_

 

_After several minutes, he appeared at the gate and punched in the code to open it. “Guess we’re going back to my room.”_

 

_Matt moved to get under Shiro’s left shoulder. “Why yours?”_

 

_“It’s closer and the night patrol already went through. If we try for Shiro’s room or yours we’ll run into them. Unless you want to explain to Iverson why two-thirds of his precious Kerberos team were out after curfew mere weeks before launch.” Keith positioned himself under Shiro’s right arm and they stood together, lifting the bigger man with difficulty._

 

_“Good lord, why does he weigh so much?” Matt huffed._

 

_“Because he’s a head taller than either of us, of course. Stop talking.”_

 

_They got him to Keith’s room and wrestled him inside. Matt followed as Keith moved to dump him on the unmade bed instead of the couch across from it. Keith immediately knelt and began removing Shiro’s shoes. “You’ll probably be clear to get back to your room if you leave in five minutes.”_

 

_Matt didn’t respond, watching as Keith moved up to work Shiro’s jacket off and rearrange the covers around him. When Keith smoothed Shiro’s bangs away from his forehead, Matt couldn’t hold the question in any longer._

_  
_ _“What the hell are you going to do while we’re out there?”_

 

_Keith looked up with a smile full of bitterness. “Go to class. Study. Keep flying sims until they’re ready to let me fly the real thing. Wait for you to get back.”_

 

_“If it makes you feel any better, he’s going to miss you just as much.”_

 

_Keith sat on the edge of the bed. “Not really. Just means we’ll both be miserable when we stop to think about it.”_

 

_Matt moved forward and put a hand to Keith’s shoulder. “You should talk to my sister. She should be arriving here about the time we start back from Kerberos.”_

 

_“Misery loves company?”_

 

_“More like she and I have...ways to keep in touch.”_

 

_Keith’s eyebrows rose at that and he glanced down at Shiro. “That… would be amazing.” He looked up again. “Thanks, Matt. You… you’re a good friend.”_

 

_Matt blinked, then smiled. He had never expected to hear Keith say something like that out loud._

 

_Then Keith knocked his hand away. “Go if you’re going to avoid the patrol. I have no intention of sharing my couch or leaving you on the floor and tripping over you. I’ll text you in the morning.”_

 

_Matt nodded and slipped out, but saw Keith lean forward and press a kiss to Shiro’s forehead before he closed the door._

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Allura’s fingers flew over the control panel to the cryo-pod, her eyes flickering between the readout for its occupant and the records from when they had healed Shiro before.

 

“The chromosome structure is an identical match.”

 

Hunk peered over her shoulder. “Then how can we be sure it’s not Shiro?”

 

“It’s not.”

 

They all looked at Matt, standing next to the cryo-pod that held Keith. The argument over whether Keith would even consent to it had ended when his voice gave out completely and Matt had shoved him into the room for changing into the insulated white suit, threatening to strip him himself if he didn’t get on with it.

 

“How do you know?” Allura asked.

 

Matt flapped a hand toward them. “His arm.”

 

She frowned. “The Galra arm? What about it?”

 

“No, his arm. The left one. His scar is gone. If I’d seen him out of armor sooner, I’d’ve known.”

 

Allura looked at the unmarked skin below the sleeve of the insulation suit. “I don’t understand.”

 

“On our way out to Kerberos, we were responsible for maintaining the ship. The lion’s share…” He trailed off, realizing what he’d said, then continued. “Shiro did most of the heavy work. He trained with the engineers for it. Anyway, one day he was trying to replace a conduit that had cracked and he forgot to reroute the power around it first. He brushed up against the next conduit and burned his arm.” Matt traced a line down his own forearm. “We treated it, it wasn’t that bad, but it left a scar. The scar is missing, ergo this person is a Shiro look-alike, who is probably missing every scar Shiro ever got over his entire life.”

 

Allura pointed to the clone’s face. “What about that one?”

 

Matt shrugged. “They had to replicate that one, since it’s blatantly visible. But if what he told Keith is true, they didn’t have access to Shiro to try and copy every scar on him.”

 

Allura shook her head. “But how would they replicate it? I don’t think there’s any difference!”

 

A sharp intake of breath drew their attention. Hunk was staring at the clone, his own face a few shades paler than normal. “Oh, man…”

 

“Hunk?” Allura stepped toward him.

 

Hunk gestured vaguely at his own face. “When we rescued Shay from the Balmera, they had her tied up and gagged. It was some weird mask thing covering almost her whole face. The top edge…” Hunk traced a line over his nose.

 

Matt nodded. “I’ve seen them They’re more like muzzles than gags. Olia told me once that some of them have circuits woven in that burn if the captive keeps screaming--” He broke off and swallowed hard.

 

All three of them looked down, absorbing the implications.

 

They were jolted out of their silence as Lance and Coran ran into the cryo-room. Lance skidded to a halt, taking in the sight of three cryo-pods in use. Keith’s neck still ringed in purple and black bruises. Shiro without his Galra arm.

 

“What the hell happened here?”

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this one is done! I really, really enjoyed writing Matt in this one, so I may find a second part to this in me later on...after I make progress on all the other stuff I'm working on. Thanks as always for your wonderful feedback. And thanks to [Latart0903](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latart0903/pseuds/Latart0903) for all the beta work!

 

 

He sat in Shiro’s chair, looking out through the windows at the sunset. He knew that Shiro loved sunsets almost as much as the night sky. He would watch the colors change, reflecting in the clouds and shading from light to dark.

 

He had seen a number of sunsets since the Voltron team found him, establishing the coalition base on Olkarion, and traveling to dozens of planets to rally support.

 

Could Shiro see sunsets from wherever he was?

 

He lowered his head, intending to put his face in his hands and let the guilt wash over him. Keith’s voice echoed in his thoughts.

 

_Not your fault. It’s not your fault._

 

But he jerked as he had to catch himself, because one of his hands wasn’t there to take the weight.

 

He made a fist with his remaining hand and braced his forehead against it.

 

“Not bad. I think Rodin would be pleased.”

 

His head snapped up, seeing Matt as he entered the command deck. “What?”

 

“You know, the statue? _The Thinker?_ Of course the statue’s chin is resting on his hand instead, and there’s the obvious…” Matt gestured at him.

 

He smiled a little. Matt was the only one of them not tiptoeing around his current state.

 

Well, there was also Pidge, who was buried in schematics as she tried to design a fast basic replacement for the arm with Altean tech.

 

He still couldn’t understand how quickly the Holts had accepted him. They should be wary like Hunk and Lance, angry at the Galra’s deception like Allura and Coran.

 

Or visibly torn in two like Keith, who was blaming himself for not being confident enough to say something sooner, restart the search for Shiro sooner. And feeling guilty over how he was retreating from Shiro’s double, who had not consciously known he wasn’t the real thing.

 

_Pidge emerged from her pod, frantic to share what she had seen, Matt calmed her down and explained. She turned to Coran and Allura and asked one question._

 

_“Are you one hundred percent sure that all the Galra alterations are disabled?”_

 

_“Yes,” Allura answered. “Everything has been deactivated and the Olkari are working on how to safely draw the last bits of it out of him.”_

 

_Pidge nodded and then threw herself onto him. “I am so sorry all this happened to you! We’re going to help, I promise!”_

 

Matt plopped down on the floor beside the chair. “Need to talk?”

 

“I’m still feeling sort of numb. It’s hard to believe I’m alive. I keep seeing the numbers going down on the bomb or Black’s paw coming at me. It’s kind of terrifying. I need… I need to figure out who I am. And where to go from here. I should probably talk to Captain Olia and see if I can be of any help in the rebel forces.”

 

Matt nodded. “If that’s what you really want. It would be hard to leave all your friends here behind.”

 

“They’re not my friends! They’re Shiro’s friends!”

 

“No reason they can’t be yours, too.”

 

“Don’t you get it? I took his place! _I stole his life!_ They stopped looking for him because of me! I spent months doing who only knows what kind of damage to them! I passed on information and nearly got us killed! I drove Keith away!”

 

“And yet the Voltron Coalition exists and is growing. We’ve cut off a third of the Galra Empire. We’re about to negotiate with their crown prince. We’re closer than ever to our goals and part of that is because of you and who you are. Not Shiro. You.”

 

He looked away. “I don’t even know who I am now.”

 

Matt shrugged. “Are you Takashi?”

 

He shook his head immediately. “I am not taking anything else from him. I won’t do that. No Takashi, Taka, Kashi, or any other derivations thereof.”

 

“Okay. You could give him something instead.”

 

“What?”

 

“Think back. You’ve got all the memories, right? Think back. Shiro told Dad and me the story while we were on our way to Kerberos. His mom was expecting twins and—”

 

His mind seized on the memory, how his mother would tell the story on occasion. “One was born with lung defects and died during the operation to try and save him…”

 

“They named him Ryou.” Matt’s eyes shifted to look at something behind him. “Whaddya think, Keith?”

 

He turned and saw Keith, dressed in his Marmora uniform. Keith bit his lip, considering, and then nodded. “Yeah, that can work.” He moved over to the Red Paladin’s chair and activated its control panels. “I need to update Kolivan.”

 

Matt got to his feet, patting him on his shoulder as he did so, and went over to Keith.

 

_Ryou… I’m not Shiro. I never was Shiro. But maybe I can be Ryou._

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

A short while later, everyone was gathered on the command deck. Keith was in the center, surrounded by the other paladins and Coran. Ryou stood with Matt, Captain Olia, and several other rebel commanders. Ryner and a group of Olkari were next to them. Kolivan and another Blade observed from a comms screen as Keith began the briefing.

 

“The Blade have been picking up more communications from the areas behind the Naxzela line. Most of them are pretty clear, statuses on star systems and such. Which ones have been able to kick the Galra out and which ones are still held by the fleets in their zones. A few seem to be in languages that are just too out there for the translators to understand them. And then there’s this one that the Blade just sent to us.”

 

Keith activated a control in his hand and they all listened intently.

 

Most of them frowned in confusion at the odd rhythm. But six heads snapped up in recognition upon hearing three dots, three dashes, and three dots again.

 

“That’s an SOS!” Lance shrieked.

 

“A what?” Coran voiced the collective bafflement of the non-humans.

 

“It’s a distress call, based on old Morse code…” Keith said, astonished. “We don’t use it much anymore, except for our comms specialists who learn it as backup if our usual frequencies get jammed. But the SOS is common knowledge.”

 

“It’s gotta be Shiro!” Hunk cried.

 

“Or maybe Dad?” Pidge added, her face lighting up in hope.

 

Matt was trying to listen to the rest over the conversation. “Keith, can you display it?”

 

Keith brought up a screen and played the message again. After the flickers representing the SOS, a series of numbers flashed across.

 

“Pause it!” Matt stepped forward, scanning the numbers intently.

 

Pidge joined him. “Is it Dad?”

 

“No. There’s no quantum frequency indicator, nothing to match the book. I think… I think this is just numbers based off our shift pattern. This has to be Shiro. He never had the book, but we taught him our number code.”

 

Pidge ran and vaulted into her chair, pulling up a duplicate of the message and a blank screen. “So the nonsense numbers are actually hidden coordinates!” She worked feverishly for a few minutes and sent a new series of numbers to the screen.

 

Rayner peered at them. “Those are coordinates, and they seem to be indicating the same area that the message originated from.”

 

Keith made eye contact with Matt, who nodded. “All right. Matt and I will take a pod and investigate.”

 

“A Marmora transport would be faster,” Kolivan offered.

 

“Wait, why just you two?” Lance protested.

 

“Because the rest of you need a show of strength for meeting Lotor. All five paladins.”

 

“Keith, you are the leader of Voltron!” Allura insisted. She started to move forward but Hunk laid a hand on her shoulder to stop her.

 

“I get it. Lotor’s latest intel on us is almost certainly based on what the public saw when we did the shows to build the coalition.” He looked over at Ryou. “Think you can play Shiro for a few more days?”

 

Ryou lifted his gaze to Keith. “I can try.”

 

Keith nodded and gave him a small smile of encouragement. “All right, we’re set. Princess, can we get a wormhole to the general area?”

 

“Of course.” Allura’s tone was reluctant and Keith looked at her sharply.

 

Pidge jumped up and headed for the doors, grabbing both Hunk and Ryou as she passed by. “Come on, boys. We’ve got to get a working fake arm finished before meeting His Royal Purpleness. Ryner, can some of your people help?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Matt took a quick detour to the quarters Allura had assigned him as part of a large reorganization within the castle, anticipating that there might be more people traveling with them in the future. The original paladins were now in larger rooms originally meant for high-level royal staff, on the other end of a hall from Coran. Matt and Ryou had rooms on the same hall, with Matt next to Pidge (as soon as she finished excavating her old room). Keith was on his other side and the room beyond Keith’s was empty, reserved for Shiro.

 

After changing back into his rebel flightgear, Matt headed to the hangar where a pair of Blades had brought the promised transport. Keith was already there…

 

Arguing with Allura.

 

Matt approached, picking up Allura’s shrill tones. “I’m saying that we need you, Keith! We need you here to lead us! We can send out a team to find Shiro now that we know where to look—”

 

“No, Allura. I told you once before, Shiro’s the only person in my entire life who never gave up on me. But I gave up on him. I’m not doing that  a second time.”

 

Matt noticed the flicking of Allura’s ears and interrupted before she could lose her temper and say something irreparable. “Be fair to yourself, Keith. You all thought you’d found him. You didn’t give up on him. You got tricked.”

 

Allura jumped in. “Exactly! And we have the resources, the people to work with us, to fix it.”

 

“Not what I meant, Princess. I was only pointing out that Keith should stop beating himself up about the situation. But we’re the ones who should go. We’re his oldest friends out here. We know best how Shiro thinks, if we need to hunt for him once we find the source of the distress call. We’re best equipped to convince him if he suspects any kind of trap. We’re going. End of discussion.”

 

Keith held onto a neutral expression until they were inside the flyer. His shoulders sank and he let his head fall forward. He looked up at Matt through his bangs.

 

“Thanks. I was coming close to losing it out there.”

 

“I can understand. She’s persistent.”

 

“She just… It’s like before, when everyone pushed me to take Shiro’s place, and I didn’t want it!”

 

“Nature abhors a vacuum.”

 

“What?”

 

“There was a gap before, because of Shiro’s absence. Everyone wanted it filled. You all just had different visions of what that meant. For you, it meant finding Shiro again. For Allura, it meant you taking Shiro’s place. And now that we know about Ryou, you two are back where you started, seeking the same solutions to filling the Shiro gap.” Matt put a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “It’s gonna work out. We’re going to get Shiro, we’re going to give him time to re-enter, and everyone will adjust.”

 

Keith put his hand over Matt’s and squeezed. “Thanks.”

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

 

_They were leaving in a few hours._

 

_The Holt family had taken dozens of pictures. They had shaken hands with all the official people. His mother now had the leader of the ground control team cornered._

 

_“I need you to promise that you’ll go through every last check twice so they can take off safely. Promise that you will all be ready to guide them in upon return so they can land safely. Promise that your mechanics will do everything they can to keep that ship running safely.”_

 

_“Yes, ma’am, although that last part will be more on Captain Shirogane and your son once they’re in full flight.”_

 

_Matt cringed a little at his mother’s expression. She didn’t want reminders of who was in charge of what. She wanted solemn vows that this mission was going to be a success._

 

_And now she was headed for Shiro. Who was deep in conversation with a teary-eyed Keith._

 

_Matt ran up behind her and caught her elbow. “”Not now, Mom.”_

 

_“I’m just going to—”_

 

_“I know what you’re just going to. I know you’re worried, but it’s a little embarrassing. We’ve been training with Shiro for over two years. Of course he’s going to do everything he possibly can to complete the mission.”_

 

_Colleen bit her lip. “I know that. I just need to say it to him. There’s absolutely nothing else I can do to impact the outcome of this mission. I need to do this.”_

 

_That made Matt pause, realizing for the first time just how hard this particular mission must be for his mother. Before, the destination hadn’t been so far out. The missions lasted weeks instead of months. Before, it was just her husband. Now it was half her family._

 

_“Okay, I’m sorry. But at least don’t interrupt them.”_

 

_Colleen took a closer look and blinked in realization. “Oh. Is that his brother?”_

 

_Matt snorted at that. “No, Mom. The only reason those two don’t have promise rings on their fingers right now is because Shiro’s an officer and Keith’s a cadet.”_

 

_She frowned a little at that. “How old is he?”_

 

_Matt pulled his non-prescription lenses down and looked over them at his mother. “Remind me how much older Dad is than you?”_

 

_“Seven years. But we met in college.”_

 

_“And what would you have done if you’d met him sooner but still hit it off?”_

 

_She shrugged. “I don’t know! Stayed friends with him until I was eighteen? Waited to see if I still felt the same way once I did?”_

 

_Matt made an exaggerated sweeping motion with his hand toward the couple. “By the time we get back, Keith will be eighteen. You think Kerberos is long enough apart for them to have a decent perspective on things?”_

 

_Colleen bit her lip, but nodded. “All right, I understand. I won’t judge. But I’m still going to make Shiro promise to bring you two back.”_

 

_As they watched, Shiro clasped Keith’s hand and pulled him into an embrace, almost lifting the younger man off his feet as Keith wrapped his arms around Shiro’s neck.[They buried their faces into each other’s shoulders](https://v-0-3.tumblr.com/post/166407954922/dont-cry-keith). When they could see from his shaking frame that Keith had lost the battle with his tears, both Holts turned away in unspoken agreement and headed back to Sam and Katie. _

 

_Which reminded Matt, he still had to surprise Katie with the glasses..._

 

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Shiro tried again, as he did every morning a few hours after sunrise when the light was brightest in the pod. Again, there was no secret stash of fuel to be found. He was going over the floor inch by inch, looking for any kind of entrance to a hidden compartment. He’d stolen this pod from a known smugglers’ port—it stood to reason that there might be a cache of valuables hidden somewhere.

 

He had already found the scaultrite in boxes labeled as computer parts. But he couldn’t turn scaultrite into fuel and the pod wasn’t going anywhere without fuel.

 

After an hour of painstaking searching, he came up empty and the sun’s position began throwing shadows into the open cargo door. Shiro stood and stretched. Time to count the good things and keep the despair at bay. He was alive and uninjured. He had crossed over a third of the distance from his starting point to the areas where Voltron was active. His current situation was not great, but he would not starve or die of dehydration. There was no sign of civilization, which was both good and bad. Good that he wasn’t at risk of being attacked, but bad that there was no one here that might be able to help him.

 

The worst part was simply not knowing how long he had been gone. He remembered Black telling him to use his bayard and Keith’s sword bursting into flames before the Red Paladin drove it into Zarkon’s robeast armor. He had lost consciousness with the energy backlash.

 

And woken up in the other realm.

 

Shiro had no idea how long he had remained in the endless twilight. He had walked forever, feeling heavier and more substantial than he remembered from his first experience. There had been no hunger, no thirst, no desire to sleep. He kept going, occasionally calling for Black and getting no response.

 

And without warning, he had fallen through the ground and into reality once more.

 

He had been incredibly lucky, emerging in space close enough to an active asteroid port that his jetpack would get him there. Able to offer his services as a pilot in exchange for transport to the next major star system. Able to rig the first coded message and transmit it in the hopes that Keith and the others would pick up the SOS and investigate.

 

He formed a routine, slowly working his way back toward Galra territory and transmitting a new message at every opportunity. It got harder as he got closer. He needed to hide his armor and his face from anyone who might be paying attention to the large rewards the Galra were offering for the capture of a paladin of Voltron or the former Champion. When exchanging work for passage got too risky, he stole his first transport pod and kept going. The current ship was the fourth he’d taken.

 

And having to veer off course to avoid a Galra fleet had gotten him stuck here, on an uninhabited planet in a star system with no spacefaring people and no resources to get moving again.

 

Feeling the despair creeping in despite his efforts, Shiro moved. He gathered the water pouches and a canvas-like bag. Time to hit the stream and gather the day’s supply of fruit, something that was shaped like a pear but tasted like lime and mango. He had a stash of seeds set aside in the hopes of bringing them to Hunk if... _when_ he found the team again.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

It was late on the sixth day when Keith and Matt got a solid lead.

 

They had found the smuggler in a bar, drinking and cursing the scarred-up black-and-white _jegerfor_ that had stolen his ship. He had taken the handful of GAC that Matt offered and described the guy who had first offered to pilot for him but had then jumped in and taken off in his ship when a patrol of Galra appeared. They got the ship specs from him and promised to try and return the vessel if they could.

 

Now Keith was flying the Marmora transport as they went in what seemed to be the most direct route back toward Naxzela. Matt was monitoring readouts, trying to find traces of the ship through a variety of factors. He was so intent on watching for any sign from his screens that when the device Coran had provided started beeping, Keith was the one to reach over and pick it up.

 

“We’ve got a positive ID from the Altean tracer!”

 

Matt started, pulled out of his fierce concentration, and grabbed it from him to connect it to Keith’s monitor. “This is supposed to hone in on his armor, correct?”

 

Keith nodded, bringing the transport about to follow the signal. “Looks like it’s a few vargas away.”

 

“Do we contact the team?”

 

“Not yet. Let’s not get their hopes up.”

 

Matt caught the underlying message: _I can’t divide my focus now._ He didn’t argue.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

As Shiro crested the last hill, he stopped short at seeing a strange ship in the valley, almost next to his pod. He immediately ducked behind the nearest cluster of trees and brought up magnification in his visor.

 

There were no easy identifiers on the unknown ship. Its three-pronged configuration was unfamiliar, but there was nothing pointing to it being of Galra origin. It was bigger than his pod, but much smaller than the Black Lion. Shiro kept looking for who had flown it here.

 

And then he spotted them. Two figures were searching the pod. He could see one inside the large cargo hold and the other on the ground, apparently monitoring something in their hand.

 

The one standing outside looked vaguely familiar, with the belted cloak and full helmet. But Shiro couldn’t place it immediately. Then the second figure climbed out of the transport and Shiro sucked in a surprised breath.

 

That was a Blade!

 

The Blade approached the other and Shiro frowned. Either the figure in brown was gigantic or that was a very small Galra…

 

_It can’t be… Can it?_

 

Shiro stepped out from the trees and started down the hill. He shifted the bag and water pouches to his left hand to free up his right hand, just in case. The brown figure was waving something around and suddenly turned in his direction.

 

Shiro froze, ready to drop his supplies and bring up his shield.

 

The Blade turned as well, following the one in brown, and broke into a run at him. He showed no weapon and as he moved Shiro was more and more sure. Then the mask dissolved, revealing the face beneath. The face that had caught his attention so long ago, emerging from the simulator with a dissatisfied glare even as the others threw congratulations at him. The face that he had fallen in love with under a star-filled sky. The face he had kissed countless times. And the face he had held in his heart as he fought his way back across galaxies.

 

“Keith?”

 

The response was joyful. “Shiro!”

 

Keith leaped at him and Shiro let his load fall in order to catch him.

 

<> <> <> <> <>

 

Matt hung back, even though he wanted nothing more than to run at Shiro and tackle him to the ground. He watched, his cheeks almost hurting from grinning so wide as Keith tried to kiss Shiro around his helmet and visor, then pulled the helmet off and tossed it away before grabbing Shiro’s face and kissing him soundly. Shiro shifted his weight forward, setting Keith back on his feet but not breaking the kiss. Finally they separated, resting their foreheads together and running their hands through the other’s hair or down the other’s back.

 

Matt walked toward them, making his approach clear and watching for any sign from Keith that he should wait. Instead, Keith waved at him to hurry up.

 

Shiro looked between the two of them. “Who’s your friend?”

 

Keith’s chin jutted out and he gave Matt a look. “Take off the helmet, you dork!”

 

“Oh, right!” Matt pulled the mask off. “Hi, there.”

 

Shiro’s mouth dropped open and he stared for a moment. “Matt?”

 

“The one and only.”

 

Shiro reached out a hand and Matt took it. This time he was totally unsurprised to be pulled into a tight hug and got his own arm around Shiro. He gave it a moment, then reached over to haul Keith in as well.

 

“How did… How did you two find each other?”

 

“Aw, you don’t want to hear about all of the adventures we had finding you?” Matt mock-pouted.

 

Keith elbowed him. “Because that’s the easy part. We followed your SOS here. Pidge managed to track Matt down.”

 

Shiro laughed at that. “Of course she did. What about your dad?”

 

“Nothing yet. But we’ll keep trying.”

 

“And what are you doing in that getup? Did you think your armor was too conspicuous?”

 

Keith bit his lip and looked away. “It’s a long story. How about we contact the castle and see if they can wormhole in? I know everyone else is going to be thrilled that we found you.”

 

“Plus there’s been a few interesting...additions to the team,” Matt added. “It’s been a mess but I think it’ll all work out in the end.”

 

Shiro’s expression shifted between anticipation and concern. “I can’t wait.” He draped an arm around each of them. “It’ll be good to be back.”

 

Keith gave an amused sniff and hugged Shiro once more. “It’s good to have you back.”

 

Matt smiled in satisfaction. This finally felt like a proper reunion of the Garrison three. This was the Keith and Shiro he remembered.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra shout-out to v-0-3 on Tumblr, [whose gorgeous art](https://v-0-3.tumblr.com/post/166407954922/dont-cry-keith) was in my head when I wrote the final pre-Kerberos scene.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you as always for reading, kudos, and comments!


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